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| An update about BerkeleyI've been going to school here for exactly 2 months. Idk why but it feels longer. Initially, I really didn't like Cal. And from time to time, I get into these moods where I realllly dislike Cal... it's reasonable that these moods occur around taking midterms and receiving them back. Butttt I had to, sorta did, still am getting used to it. Everything here is so crazy! The competition here really is fucking crazy! The rigorous material commands us to think so critically and conceptually that sometimes I feel like I'll burst a nerve in my brain. I don't want to think of it all negatively because I do learn a lot here but a lot of it, I learn by myself and it makes me wonder why I'm paying stacks for an education that I'm basically teaching myself out of $80 textbooks. Maybe my professors this semester aren't all that great, 2 of em didn't get great reviews on ratemyprofessor.com haha but then again, there's only so much you can teach in an hour of lecture. I've cried a couple times since I've been here from the stress but I try to learn from it. Main Stacks, the underground division of Moffit Library, has become my hiding spot. I spend hours there a day; it's so peaceful and tranquil there, perfect place for me to study... I enjoy it a lot. I used to hate studying at the library haha. Aside from class and spending hours on work and studying, I actually get a lot of free time and a lot of nap time :) I'm on a 9hr-a-day sleep cycle so I never feel exhausted. Oh and the food here is fucking delicious. Not only are their sandwiches, cafeteria food, rice bowls, smoothies, etc. edible but they are really tasty as well! Even the prepackaged foods are good; I went a week eating only the packaged noodles that they had cause they were sooo addicting. Almost everything we have has a reference to our Oski Bear mascot... telebears, bearfacts, airbears, golden bear cafe, bear market, etc. so that automatically places us in the "Cute" category :)
All in all, I have a like-dislike relationship with UC Berkeley. It's not at the point where I love it yet but it's not so bad that I have a hatred for it. Guess I'll just have to see over the next couple of years!
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| SadSo me and him were laying down on the couch, facing each other. I was sorta staring off into space and looked back at him.
him: "you know I was just talking to you silently in my head hahah"
me: "what did you say?"
"nothing, it's not important haha"
"tell me"
"nooo, it really isnt anything"
"just tell me!"
"No, just kiss me"
"nooo, tell me... you already said something about it, how are you going to not tell me? (I hate it when ppl leave me hanging like that) I promise that I'll kiss you, no matter what you were saying in your head"
So we argued like this for like 5 min. Took a while for me to get it out of him; he was being a little stubborn ass.
me: "Just tell me, please", etc.
him: "I was just like 'baby. baby! baby, look at me! (he was saying that cause I was looking off into nowhere). baby, please don't go to Berkeley. Please don't leave, please just stay with me"
='(
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| Sometimes,I fucking love my busy life. I'm almost never bored now. I'm hella used to a full load of units with a 23-28 hr workweek.
I got a housing offer from Cal. A triple in Unit 3, I was like hellllll naaaaaay but have to :|
I actually talked to my dad about going to UC Berkeley. He said that I have to stick to a plan and that if I don't at least try it out, I'll spend my whole life regretting it and wondering how it would've been. So we made an agreement to test it out for two semesters.
Yesterday was the boyfriend's 19th birthday. I got him a hella nice gray peacoat and I'm also making him something else to present to him on the day of his celebration. I spent waaay too much money on his birthday but I don't fuck around with it comes to my baby's birthday. I spent more than $50 on shit just for his invites -_- I even got a sticker machine for it; it's sooo siiiick! Yesterday, had dinner with him and his fam at Olive Garden and went back to his place. Spent hrs on finishing up the invites and just slept over there. Today, woke up, went to Kaiser then to Fremont HS to give out some of the invites, home to change, Safeway to get food, Walmart to get chocolates and lip rings, and then I had work at 6pm. Stayed later than usual and went to get some groceries for Mom in prep for Thanksgiving day. How the hell is she gonna make me bake her cornbread at midnight when I'm not even gonna eat thanksgiving dinner at home -_- Things are better now but I'd still rather work. It's only 4 hrs and I get time and a half :) Cash monaaay, rogue.
So much has happened these past weeks. Went clubbing for halloween and that was hella fun. Went clubbing the week after but it wasn't so fun cause I was hella tired after a 9 hr shift. & then a week after that was Jeli's 18th party at the Lookout. Hella good music, good dj but not that many ppl were dancing. I had hellllla fun though dancing the night away with my boo and the guys. Oh & Nov 2nd was Grace's baby's, Loretta, 1st birthday. Ahhh, she is fucking cuuuuute as fuck! & she's gonna grow up to be a badass with a mouthpiece like her mama hahaha. She's Allister's goddaughter so of course he spoiled her ass, he got her a nice ass top and a peacoat.
He woke her up from her nap when he was kissing her hahaha
Aw, can't wait til when Allister and I bring her to see Santa hahaha fuuuuck she's so chill and cute
Nothing too crazy has happened. Life is good right now. I should get off and get some sleep though. Gotta wake up early and get ready for another busy ass day. Happy Thanksgiving
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| Where the fuck did the time go?!Fucking busy as helllll that time goes by so quickly! So I started my new position as Front End Supervisor a couple weeks ago. I'm part time so usually, my hours won't go over 30 per week but fuck, this week I got 30.5 hours of work on top of school. I know it's manageable though so I'm stickin' through.
Halloween is already coming up this friday and then Grace's baby/Allister's goddaughter, Loretta's 1st bday is this Sunday already! The girl is growing fasttttt! Can't wait to go shopping for her gift though, Allister and I are gonna get her little peacoats and cute winter clothes :)
& then it's already going to be November... Thanksgiving is gonna be coming up and my baby's 19th birthday and then by the time you know it, it'll be Christmas and then January which is the month I leave for Berkeley =/
I honestly do not want to leave at all. I'm so comfortable with my life here, with my family, boyfriend, group of friends, school, work, etc. Even though de Anza is a little like high school, I love it! It's easy to get top scores too whereas at Cal, the competition is gonna be crazzzzy!!! And classes at de Anza allow me to still maintain a job and a social life. Things are so good right now cause my parents actually don't trip off of me coming home late or not coming home at all. They didn't even give a fuck about my new lip piercing. My mom actually asked me why I didn't get my nose instead -__- They didn't give me the professionalism and appearance crap that I would expect cause I guess I've been dedicating most of my time to my work and studies and I recently got promoted.
I really do ponder whether Berkeley will upset this balance of mine and I honestly believe that it may =(((
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| TiredI have a couple updates but that'll have to wait for my next blog when I have time for it. Tryna make this short so I can go to sleep soon. I've been hella busy. So when I'm not at school or work, I'm with Allister most of the time. And most of the time that we're together, we study together. Hella school-oriented right now. In trig, we had our first test and shit was only 10 problems hella easy. I think I was the first one to finish after about half an hour. Ugh, I'm wasting time... I shouldn't be in that class and learning that material that I've learned sophomore year of high school. Idk, placement tests aren't my friends =/
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